Make Sure You Do: Before You Say ?I Do?
Tina Turner asked an important question in the title of her hit song; What's Love Got To Do With It? Yes love is important but love don't pay the bills. It is not be enough to be "in love." Couples must have the basic skills necessary for building and enhancing the relationship over time. Lasting marriages require partners who are committed to respecting one another, who have gained knowledge about what makes marriage work, and who have developed skills that will enhance rather than deteriorate the relationship. It is mind boggling that so many spend countless hours planning for the great wedding day. That's right; it is only for one day; a mere drop in the ocean of time. Here today, gone tomorrow; then what? It is just plain ignorant to spend numerous weeks and even months planning for the wedding that last a day and ignore the marriage that is expected to endure for a lifetime. It makes good sense then, to spend at least an equal amount of time preparing for married life. By reading this article, you have taken the first step toward increasing your awareness. I applaud you. Whenever I perform a wedding ceremony, it usually includes these words: Do you promise to love, honor, cherish, and protect him/her, forsaking all others and holding only unto him/her according to God's holy law; and thus pledge your faithfulness. It is disconcerting that nearly half of all married couples regretted uttering those profound words and have since divorced. I believe that the most egregious mistake these couples made was not spending enough time seriously planning for a lifetime together in marriage. Though most couples do claim to take their wedding vows seriously, often what has been disregarded is really getting to know each other on a level beneath the surface. Women, particularly, seem to approach marriage from a fantasy "happy-ever-after" mentality. We do not seem to realize that what we think we "see" is not perfect reality. And, what we think we feel is related to what we think we see. In other words, we tend to approach marriage with a distorted perception of what married life will be like. In a way, it can be analogized to an adolescent girl who always wanted a baby until she actually had one and the reality of parental responsibility ferociously slapped her in the face; or the teen young man who didn't understand that as soon as he hit adulthood, the system would relentlessly seek child support payments from him for each child he has fathered. Keep in mind that who you marry will have a dramatic impact on all aspects of your life; spiritual, emotional, mental, and physical health. Marriage is serious business and should be given serious thought. It is not optional, it is obligatory. Take a long and hard look before you leap. Rev. Saundra L. Washington, is an ordained clergywoman, social worker, and Founder of AMEN Ministries http://www.clergyservices4u.org. She is also the author of two coffee table books: Room Beneath the Snow: Poems that Preach and Negative Disturbances: Homilies that Teach.
Her new book, Out of Deep Water: A Grief Healing Workbook, will be available soon.
Related News
|
 |
|
|
RELATED ARTICLES
What Can You Do To Make Your Reception a Success?
This is something that we've started to send to all our clients about a week prior to their wedding. It has really helped both the bride/groom and their families get the most out of their wedding receptions:
The Monogram Theme Wedding
Monograms are a huge trend in weddings, to the point where they feature strongly in some, and in others, provide the actual theme. And what's not to like about monograms? They're elegant, understated, versatile, and a dramatic visual reminder of your new life together.
Top 10 Wedding Decoration Budget Tips
When it comes to choosing your wedding decorations, you must decide on your theme. Once you have done this, you can then make your decisions about the budget that you will have.
Basic Tips for Planning a Wedding
Planning a wedding should be fun and exciting. However, if you don't do the proper research and stay within your budget things can go bad in a hurry. What you need is to keep things well organized and simple. Here are some tips to help make sure your weeding plans go smoothly.
How to Keep Hope Alive During a Marriage Crisis
During a marriage crisis, you can feel like your whole world is falling apart and all of your dreams are being shattered. Hearing the words "I don't love you anymore," "I want a divorce," or "I don't know if I want to stay married" can leave you reeling from the shock.
How to Select a Wedding Photographer
Selecting a wedding photographer can be a daunting task. Not only does the photographer need to be able to produce outstanding memories of your wedding day but also has to be able to fit into the celebration and be highly professional every step of the way.
How You Answer This Question Can Change Your Marriage
Imagine the following scenario. Your spouse has given you an important letter to mail and is counting on you to mail it on your way to work. But you slip up...you forget all about it until you're on the way home. "Oh, #$@!!" is your first reaction. You know the spouse will be upset.
Wedding Photography - Tips for a Wonderful Session
Every couple wants wonderful photos of their wedding day that capture the celebration, details, romance and beauty.
Here are a few tips for a successful photo session:
The Bridezilla Syndrome: Do You Have It? Ten Ways to Avoid All the BS!
In a fast-paced world of wedding planning, stress levels are high; immune systems are low; and over the course of the past 20 years, brides have transmitted, what has become a bridal epidemic of our time.
Make Sure You Do: Before You Say ?I Do?
Tina Turner asked an important question in the title of her hit song; What's Love Got To Do With It? Yes love is important but love don't pay the bills. It is not be enough to be "in love." Couples must have the basic skills necessary for building and enhancing the relationship over time. Lasting marriages require partners who are committed to respecting one another, who have gained knowledge about what makes marriage work, and who have developed skills that will enhance rather than deteriorate the relationship.
The Charm of Homemade Wedding Favors
Homemade wedding favors come from a centuries old tradition of brides and grooms providing small gifts to wedding guests. Every culture across time has treated marriage as a wonderful event with the nuptials celebrated throughout the community. In many cultures the bride and groom are associated with good luck. A common thought among these cultures was, that every thing the couple touched would be charmed. By gifting members of the community, the couple would pass blessings to others for the rest of the year.
Hot Wedding Trend: Platinum Wedding Rings
In our hungry-for-anything new pop culture world, celebrities are often the ones that can start a hot fashion trend seemingly overnight. With their heavy media exposure, they are often photographed wearing the latest styles in fashion and jewelry.
Planning Your Wedding - How To Get Organized
You have purchased the latest bridal magazines from your local grocery store and there are pages and pages of photos of beautiful wedding gowns, rings and articles on weddings. Some give you a brief idea of what you need to do to plan your wedding, but you're still not sure how to begin the process.
Wedding Gown Styles
The wedding gown is most important choice for a bride during her wedding. Every bride dreams of an enchanted wedding and a beautiful gown is what can make the bride look like a princess.
How to Have a Sizzler of a Honeymoon! Article No.5
Every woman in the room agreed that Crichton was a cracker of a butler. Even before you began to open your mouth to say, "Crichton, I need" there was a shawl around your cold shoulders, drink in your thirsty hand, and a foot stool under your weary feet.
Fifteen Fabulous Favors
The possibilities are endless when it comes to creating (or choosing) wedding favors. Take a look at the list below for fifteen fabulous ideas.
Women and Marital Issues According to Internet
Following is a list of question that, I believe, can lead to an in-depth discussion on this most vital issue. I hope you can take advantage of this opportunity to avail yourself of these questions in any appropriate situation.
Wedding Rings
Your wedding rings were meant to last a lifetime. They are the unique symbol of your devotion to each other and the design should be something that you both can agree on. The most unique wedding rings are the one which you design your selves, and there are many mediums to choose from. Wedding rings are no longer just simple gold bands, they come in all metals, and you can even have them crafted out of stone or bone! Your wedding band will be something and you will wear all the time. Therefore, it is very important that you give a lot of thought into the design of your wedding ring.
Restore Your Marriage - 5 Ways to Feel Connected to Your Spouse Even on Opposite Schedules
We've all been through times in our lives when it was so busy we would rarely have time to ourselves let alone time to contact our family and friends. With every day life moving as quickly as it is, there just seems to be no time to do everything in one day and get a decent amount of sleep so you can do it all over again the next day. It's no wonder why it's so hard these days for a married couple to share a strong relationship. If you feel your marriage is lacking, check out the following advice to improve or even save your marriage!
Mens Moissanite Wedding Rings, or Is Moissanite a Mans Best Friend?
As mens wedding rings become more and more popular mens moissanite wedding rings become popular at an even faster rate. Wedding rings for men are here to stay and so are mens moissanite wedding rings.
|
